Funny how things happen. One day you're doing a blog post, going on and on about crocheted boutonnieres, and then the phone rings...and all time seems to stand still...and you wonder why you were wasting so much time talking about trivial matters like crocheted boutonnieres! :-(
I'm struggling about how to do this post without boring, offending, protecting and respecting everyone's feelings. I'm sure someone is not gonna be happy. So, I'm just gonna be me. You can choose whether you want to read on or not.
I've talked about my friends numerous times on this blog...numerous times! And I've talked about my loving and even losing dear loved ones numerous times. I've even shared my poems about it. So you can't possibly know how my talking about THIS friend is any 'different' from my other friends that I've told you about...but it is. And I wanna tell you why.
This friend was not initially a friend I chose. We had a commonality in that I was friends with her two daughters. Very good friends with one of them. {We were 'Pioneer' partners...(a 'Pioneer' is a witness of Jehovah who volunteers a certain amount of time a year to the ministry of helping others learn about God and the Bible)...and we were fellow poets. :-)}
So, with my friend being a mother to my other friends, and a fellow congregation 'sister', and kinda always just being around...we also became friends. That's a simplified way of me trying to explain how we got to know each other and be friends ourselves. But it was much more complex than that...just saying. :-]
She became, as southerners say, my 'Ace Boon Coon'! The friend that was my partner in crime...the crime being surprise parties for other people, jokes pulled on close friends, letters written and phone calls made to get something or the other done NOW!
And we've been each other's ear to bend, and shoulder to cry on, at any time....when our teams lost, when the movie was good, when some family issue was trying to steal our pleasing personality, or simply because we were happy. :-]
Considering that we are from completely different sides of the track...so to speak...it's a wonder that we are friends at all!...She has New England fishing attitude. I have barefoot southern girl attitude...She's white. I'm black...She's been comfortable financially most of her life. I was a welfare child, and was a paycheck-to-paycheck kind of girl, most of my life...I could go on and on about our differences...but I won't. :-]
We have so many, many more things in common!...We both have had husbands that spoiled us rotten! ^_^ In fact, our anniversaries were both in July! I can hardly think of my own anniversary without thinking of hers...She lost her dear husband to Cancer a few years ago. So, while I smile every year in July that hubby and I have made it another year, I also shed a tear for her...that her journey in this life is now without the male 'Ethel' to her 'Lucy'. :-]
Other things we have in common are that we both have strong personalities. We love ourselves and we love other people...We don't go looking for controversy. But nor do we back down from it, when it comes looking for us!...We're fiercely loyal. Hate unfairness...and diets. :-) We're up for just about any fun thing at the drop of a hat!...and we've proven throughout the years that we'll travel any road...no matter how long...to help someone in need.
I know! I know!...You've all got friends like that. But your friend is not THIS friend....and your friend may not be in the battle of her life FOR her life right now. Mine is. :-( That was the phone call I got yesterday while I was blogging about boutonnieres. :-(
Her daughter...also my friend....called. This friend, her mom, is in the hospital. She didn't even tell me she was going to have surgery. And I know why. :-( She probably thought she could get through it without me finding out and she wouldn't have to worry me. :-( That's how she is...she was looking at surgery, but worried that I would worry!
As it turns out the stage one Cancer she was thinking would just get removed...upon opening her up during surgery, is more than they thought. It's actually stage four! :-( And there is other complications as well...which I won't get into for her privacy.
I'm not telling you all of this for conversations sake. I'm telling YOU because it's kind of a way to tell myself! I'm going back and forth from almost non-belief, to sheer terror at the thought of her going through chemo-therapy...or dying!!!! *_* I don't want to think about it...I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT!!!...but I have to! I have praying to do!!...Now is no time to evacuate my mental stability and my conversations with God!! Now is the time to ramp them up!...in her behalf!
He already knows her. She's made sure of that!...I just want to let him know that I know her too! :-] And she could use an extra hand to hold right now...so to speak...since I can't physically be there to hold it for her.
Ever since yesterday I've been crying and sleeping.....Yes, SLEEPING!!!...*shaking my head*...In fact, I slept almost the whole day away...when I wasn't crying I mean...Enough of that now!! How am I gonna help her through this if I can't keep my eyes clear of tears...and open?!...{She would be laughing at me right now if she saw that last line! ^_^}
So, no more 'Woe Is Me' talk! I'm not the first person with a friend battling Cancer. Even stage four Cancer!...unfortunately. And if this system continues, I won't be the last! And besides, she needs my sense of humor now. And my threats of busting her out of that hospital. And my surprise 'file-in-the-plant-soil' to help her saw her way out of that airy...and no doubt ugly...'johnny' (hospital nightgown) I know they have her in! LOL
I'm feeling better now...and awake...and on a mission! :-) Have a good day everybody! PLEASE!!!! :-] I'll try not to be so wordy tomorrow.....Who am I kidding?! LOL
Let The Poem Say It
Yes, you've been my friend.
For many years you've born that chore.
But we've really been 'heart sisters'
for what seems like many more.
I didn't know I'd love you so.
Although it seemed right from the start,
that we could giggle over nothing
and never want to be apart.
I was friends first with your daughters.
One, a Poet, just like me.
The love for you and your dear husband
poured from them so soft and free.
But we were 'sisters', 'partners', 'gals'.
The apples of our husband's eyes.
(Good men who spoiled us both a plenty!
The skies from which our suns would rise.)
I've watched you, all these years,
be a friend no one could beat.
And yes, I've seen your anger flare,
No, not the flame, just felt the heat.
The two of us have talked for hours,
cried our way through movies...true.
Well, we've cried through many things!
So, tissue companies...we THANK YOU!
I've seen you faithful to your husband,
and to God. Nothing new.
And seen you faithfully strong through Cancer,
though it took your man from you.
I saw you take care of your mother
with such loving, tender care.
That's why I wish with all my heart,
that now, for YOU, I could be there.
You've lost your husband, mother, friends.
Lost your precious eyesight's view.
Lost ability to drive yourself,
or even see phone numbers too.
But through it all you're just as stubborn!
Like a rock, with fist held high.
With a wink upon your eyelid,
and, I knew, a secret cry.
Now, the trial of life is bigger,
and the battle is anew.
All the support that you have given
will be given now...to you.
I've always felt you could move mountains.
I've seen you do it many times.
So, get to work on this one, sister.
The fearful mountain, though, is mine.
I fear that you will be too helpless.
That the 'YOU' I know won't be.
That the situations coming
will steal your big personality.
If you could see me writing this
you'd probably yell at me and smile.
So, I just spanked my own left hand.
I love you...see you in a while.
