Tuesday, April 19, 2011

The Words "He's Not THAT Big" and "SPIDER" Should Not Be In The Same Sentence!!!

        Don't let this cute little Newly-Webbed...Print by hisss fool you!! And if you're creeped out by spiders, do not proceed any further in this post! That was your WARNING!! ^_^
     You are not going to believe what happened to me yesterday!!...Oh Yeah! I know! Usually when somebody says that, they're just trying to get your attention, or spin some kind of yarn (story) just so you'll pay attention to them! But, seriously, while it's probably gonna sound like it, I didn't make it up....honest! O_0
           {Copper Wire Art Black Spider...by SpiderwoodHollow}
     As my morning started to wear on yesterday, my body started aching (actually, that's probably what woke me up in the first place!). I wasn't feeling well, and hubby, to try to make me feel better, had come in and given me a nice bowl of pork and rice. Then he left the house.
     As I was sitting there stretching my legs ,and wiggling my toes, and chomping on my food...out of the corner of my left eye I saw something really big and black come out from under the bathroom door!! At first, because I have two fans blowing on me almost all the time (hormones!), I thought maybe a big piece of lent, or one of my stray pieces of yarn or thread was getting blown across the room.
    But then it started crawling across the floor really fast, as if it was headed somewhere specific! And I realized....Nooooooooo! It wasn't a piece of yarn....or lent! It was a H-U-G-E spider!!!!!!! :-0 And when I say H-U-G-E...I mean H-U-G-E!!! I mean the size spider you expect somebody to have in a terrarium as a pet! Not the size that you find over the doorway sitting waaaay back in the corner of the web!!
     Just for perspective...Not this size....
        ...It wasn't a giant radioactive tarantula! {Even I wouldn't exaggerate his size that bad! LOL} But I would say that the first thing I thought when I saw him hurrying across the floor like he had somewhere he needed to be right away, was "YIKES!!!! TARANTULA!!!!"...and he was like this size!
       Next thing I did was get really freaked out....because I didn't know where he could have possibly come from!...{We hardly have ANY spiders in our house usually, never mind any THIS big!!}...Or......*gulp*...where he now had went!!!!! O_0
     I hurried and got out of his reach fast!....On the bed, with feet pulled up, cover tucked under them, (JUST IN CASE!!) and my cane in hand!! {Uh...the cane was for beating the edges of the bed cover just in case he had some idea he might want to climb up the side of the bed and inject his spider venom into my leg or something!!.....What?!! O_0....It could happen!!!}
     Then I frantically blew up my hubby's phone about 25 times!! slowly dialed my hubby to find out if he could please come home and rescue me! LOL....He didn't answer... *gulp* Now what?!!! Suppose he...Well, she...was laying eggs somewhere?!!!!!!!! {As you can tell, rational thought was not in big supply yesterday!} 
    Okay! I needed to be brave!...I needed one of these....
      ...And since I didn't have a Spiderman Cape, I needed a partner in crime! So I called my girlfriend...And by the time she answered the phone I was in a puddle of tears!! I spurted out, through my sobbing: "I don't know what to do!...He's HUGE!!!...I don't know where he is!.....I have my cane beating the side of the bed!.....No!...I'm awake!....No,....I'm not kidding!!"
     And like a true girlfriend....have I told you before how much I love her?! :-) ...she said "I'll be right over!!" {Of course that was after some questions as to exactly how big he was, and some talking about the perils of having on open-toed sandals!" LOL
     By the time she got here I had said a prayer and....{IMAGINE!! Praying to God to protect me from a spider....*smh*...a spider that......NEVER MIND!!! I did it!.....and it worked!!!}...I was amazingly calmed down! I proceeded to finish eating my pork and rice. {Just in case the spider could smell it and might start heading up the bed covers looking for something to eat!!}
     My girlfriend came in the house, cautiously looked around,...EVERYWHERE (while keeping something on top of her feet at all times, to protect her toes from the spider's fangs), and COULDN'T FIND IT ANYWHERE!!! O_0 By now I was thinking: "Where is a Spider-man when you need one, anyway"?!!
      After a Looooooong time of moving things out of places, and putting things back into all of the places you took them out of...{I mean, I don't live in a dump after all! LOL}...she had to leave. She made me assure her that I was okay, and offered to stay until the cavalry hubby arrived. But I assured her that that wasn't necessary. After all, I had prayed! And even a spider was no match for Jehovah God!! LOL
     Now, the funny thing is that after she left, and I sat there looking around a little bit....I TOTALLY forgot about the spider!! No kidding!! I finished my pork and rice, finished reading my book (To Kill A Mockingbird)...out loud, and did a little tweeting online!...Then hubby calls and I had to recant the whole thing all over again and........UGH!!! Back on spider alert!!! O_0  Thanks Hubby!!!
     By the time hubby got home he was mentally "IN"!! He was slowly creeping around corners, moving things in slow motion...even before he came in to see if I was okay! :-) Aren't hubby's great!!! :-) 
     My girlfriend called to see if I was still alive, and to ask me if maybe I thought it might have been just in my mind!!....Okay, so girlfriends can't have your back every second of the day!!! LOL But I assured her that 'OH YEAH!! My mind is just fine!' And my eyes are too!!
   Then, out of nowhere, while I was still on the phone with my girlfriend, hubby yelled: "I FOUND HIM!...WOW!!!" I immediately felt the adrenaline pumping back through my veins...and not in a good way! I started crying and got all jittery! My girlfriend....Thank you!...said: "Take a picture of it and send it to me!!"
   Hubby came and got the camera.....YES HE DID!!! :-) And this is what he saw!
       Now, trust me when I tell you that this photo is not doing the size of this spider justice! But unless you're blind I would venture to say that you wouldn't want this thing running across your floor.....with no luggage, passport, or nothing!! LOL
     When I uploaded the pictures and sent them to my girlfriend she had the nerve to say: "Awwwww! He's not that big!".....Really?!! I wonder what the insects in her neighborhood are eating?!! That thing is HUGE!!!! My hubby's assessment of his size was that he was waaaay bigger than a quarter! {That was a size description I gave him earlier}
    After photographing the specimen, my hubby took the......Well, just in case there's some insect lovers out there, I'll spare you the details. You can imagine that big old spider off in the woods, looking for a mate, romping and climbing trees......if you want to! LOL If you wanna know the real story, you can email me! ^_^

Indoor Spider

Now, I'm as peaceful as the next chap,
believe in 'Live and then Let live'!
But when it comes to indoor spiders
here's the advice that I would give:

All you spiders, though you're lovely,
far less twitching than a mouse,
Still, your place is not in MY place,
not my room, my board, my house!!
So....GET OUT!!!

{From the 2nd photo down, you can click on the photos themselves or follow their links HERE --> Copper Wire Art Black Spider...by SpiderwoodHollow; Giant radioactive tarantula magnet by superantonio; Tarantula Spider...Digital Image Transfer...by Graphique; Spider Super Hero Cape by pipandbean; Spiderman Pillowcase by russellsrusticshop}


  1. That's a great spider tale. The poem said it all, didn't it. I used to be terrified of spiders until one time when I was forced to face my fear. Now I have no problem doing away with them when I find them in my house. Yes, I said doing away with them! I don't want them coming back.
    Great pics to share too! Have a great (spider free) day my friend! LOL

  2. CinLynn, That's a completely TRUE spider tale too! Every word!!! ^_^ I still keep peepig around every once in a while this morning...but nothing like yesterday! It's never dull in my house! :-)) I'm glad you liked the poem...and I'm happy to hear you no longer have a spider fear. I'm working on it. :-) I'm not too bad with the smaller ones, but ones this size...coming out of nowhere...?! I'm not so good! ^_^

  3. That was one big, ugly spider! I am glad that your Knight in shining armour came to the rescue!

  4. Jo-anne, THANK YOU!!! I knew I wasn't the only one that would think that was a HUGE spider!!...And I agree about my knight in shining armour too! ^_^

  5. Oh my goodness, you have a most wonderful way with words! What a fabulous girlfriend you have ... and fearless husband. So glad the BIG intruder was caught and taken care of. Can't say that I'm to afraid of the little critters BUT that eight-legged creepy crawly was a monster! So happy you survived to tell the tale!

  6. Julie, Why thank you! :-) And thank you for the vote of support too...about that MONSTER! Good description! LOL And yes I do have a good girlfriend, and a good husband. :-) Have a good day J!!

  7. Spiders are NOT my favorite but as a girl my Grandmother told me that everything has a purpose so we don't kill the spiders, we take them outside. I'll tell ya, I've taken bigger ones than this OUTSIDE! My family thinks I'm crazy but it makes me feel better. They are in THEIR place and NOT in MINE! LOL Thanks for the great story!

  8. OH My...I would have been freaking too if I'd seen a spider THAT big...thank goodness you found him!

    Hope you have a spiderless day...

  9. Kelly, I am in awe of you...taking big spiders by the hand...so to speak...and escorting them back to THEIR place! LOL You're a better girl than me!!!!! ^_^ All I have to say is 'If they come in MY house....If they don't start nothing, there won't be nothing!!' LOL

  10. We Blog Artists, Thank you!!!! IYou don't know how good it makes me feel to know that I'm not the only one that thinks that this spider might be a tad TOOOOOO BIG!!!! LOL I'm going to have to make my girlfriend read all of your comments! ^_^

  11. Oh...and Debbie...thanks for answering my question in the other post...I totally agree with you...I probably have never felt it anywhere I go because I don't allow it to bother me.

    You have a huge heart and it's in the right place...thanks for your words...

  12. We Blog Artists, Thanks Char. What a nice thing to say. :-] I know that, if you visit Georgia anytime soon, you will find my 'Peeps' as warm and loving and hospitable as I always do!! ^_^

  13. *shivers*



  14. OMG that is HORRIFYING! And you are hilarious. So glad you survived that giant freaking spider. Any spider bigger than a pinky nail (or with hair) is officially huge and horrifying and calvary is def required! Also, I totally think it's funny that you still ate the rice. haha <3

  15. Holyoke Home, *shivers*...ME TOO!!!! ^_^

  16. Lindsey, Horrifying...That's the word!!! LOL And yeah, pinky nail size...totally do-able!...Hair-less....Okay, whatever...But anytime the words "scurrying" and "scooting" can be used for them....TOO BIG!!!! LOL Definitely attackable by the cavalry!! ^_^ .... And hey! If I didn't eat the rice, he might have come looking for it! {That's my story and I'm sticking to it!! ^_^}

  17. Oh my!! That is a huge spider. Despite all the spider images your post is still fun to read.

  18. Priscila, YAY! Another vote for me!! I don't care what my girlfriend says....that's a big spider!!! LOL And thank you for the nice words too! :-]

  19. glad you all found it!!! that helps you rest better

  20. Char, You're sure right about that!!! :-) But....baby spider alert continues!!

  21. OMG I thought it was going to be like that stripy one in the 4th pic! YEEOW! I hate spiders.....

  22. UGH I got goosebumps while reading this!!! I would have gone crazy too but thankfully the spiders here are never this big! I feel so fortunate now! LOL I'm glad he found it, would have been a nightmare otherwise :S always looking around thinking you might see it again....ugh

    But you know, even little spiders can be really frightening!! Some 10 years ago we were in Crete and on the wall of your hotel room there was a really tiny black spider. I took a photo of it, didn't even have a macro lens, just a regular camera and lens. But back home when I had the images printed out and saw the pic again I was freaked out! This tiny spider had HUGE eyes and they were nothing like spiders usually have, they were like....like human eyes! :S :S I have the pic somewhere if you want to see but I guess you don't after what you've been through! LOL

  23. Alittlesprite, Ha! Ha! I'm so glad it wasn't like that stripy one!!!! But still....it was bad enough!! ^_^

  24. Mariann, Thank you!!! Now you know how horrifying it was....all day!!!...And you are obviously waaaaay braver than me, going up to a spider to take a picture of it!! I couldn't believe hubby took the picture of mine...although he was creeped out and jumpy the whole time...*giggle*...And thank you, but a spider with human eyes?!....Uh NOOOOOOOO! What are you trying to do scare me to death?!!!! LOL Now I have the vision of a spider with big eyelashes and bubble eyes in my nind. Thanks Little Fox!!!! LOL


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